Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Reflections #4: May 26, 2014

My goal with these posts is to focus on the good and not the bad or where I fell short, so...


I have to live today focused on what I can give Him, how I can serve Him, and how I can help Us build Our tomorrow. 

What I gave Him today:
  • His woman/submissive/pet/lil girl...stayed...contained. While I may not have won the battle, I have fought very hard against the negative. 
  • Alfred...worked hard to stay focused and got through another round of edits for two chapters. Hopefully those provide Him with the feedback He needs and helps Us get closer to our dreams.
  • Alfred...has been intentionally trying to gain traction in an area M would like to see grow.  This seems to be slowly moving in the direction He'd like, so hopefully He'll be pleased with my efforts.
  • His submissive...pushed down defiance and obeyed even though I craved a break. 

I have to focus on what He gives me today and the steps forward He takes that lead Us toward Our tomorrow. 

What He gave me today:
  •  My Man took a few minutes out of His day to point me in a direction for one of my kids. No...it had no bearing on our short or long term goals, but it helped me avoid at least one small frustration. 
  • My Man shared a few cute tidbits of His day which helped me feel a lil less far away and helps me see that I am in His thoughts. 
  • My Man finished the second to the last round of edits for two chapters moving Us that much closer to Our future.
  • My Owner was there to answer nearly all of my permissions. Each time He's responsive helps me at least brush up against my submission to Him.
Today wasn't easy.  Today wasn't all that reaffirming.  But I got through without causing a fuss.
~DominaKat

Monday, May 26, 2014

Reflections #3: May 24, 2014


I'm purposefully taking time to reflect more intently on the positive little pieces of each day.

I have to live today focused on what I can give Him, how I can serve Him, and how I can help Us build Our tomorrow. 

What I gave Him:

  • His submissive...I silently submitted and gave in the way He wants me to.  For Him.  Because I love Him.
  • Alfred...three chapters nearly at final review stage.  They look fantastic.  Every day we're closer to another release.  Another 5 star review popped up for my amazing Man, and I quickly put together another snazzy image for promotion.
  • His pet...I obeyed.  He was right, and I'm better for having listened.
  • His property...continued to give up control and allowed Him to make decision about my habits.
  • His pet & little girl...relaxed and mellow, I let go and played in silliness late last night.  I laugh with my Daddy differently than I laugh with anyone else.  There's a purity there.  Joyous delight that only He can inspire in me.
I have to focus on what He gives me today and the steps forward He takes that lead Us toward Our tomorrow. 

What He gave me:

  • My Daddy openly shared with me and let me see in deep.  His trust humbles me, and I was able to be stronger for Him.  
  • My Man gave me a heads up on His plans.  That always helps me feel included in His life despite being so far away.  When I get updated after the fact it's hard for me not to feel a little abandoned or avoided, so I very much appreciate His help by not having to fight off those negative emotions.
  • My M kicked ass on revisions! So smooth and rich.  Each step forward in the work we're doing gets us a little closer to Our goals and dreams.
  • My Man spent time with me late last night and into the wee hours of the morning.  We laughed, debated, pondered, and dreamed.  
  • My Daddy teased His little girl in our last words before bed.  We laughed until I snorted.  My cheeks hurt this morning from the smiles He sparks and the silliness we shared.
~DominaKat

Sunday, May 25, 2014

I Believe

I believe in Him.

I believe the sun rises in His eyes and sets at His feet.
I believe there is no one better suited for me than Him.

I believe in His potential to weave magical tales.
I believe in His wisdom, common sense, and drive to succeed.

I believe there is no better place on Earth than curling up on my Daddy's chest.
I believe in His integrity.

I believe His Dominance is the air I breathe.
I believe there no other destiny for me than under His feet.

I believe in His faith in me and Us.

I believe in me.

I believe no one can love Him as deeply, truly, or purely as I can.
I believe that my submission can offer Him a lifetime of satisfaction and inspiration.

I believe I can help Him reach for the stars.
I believe that my loyalty to Him will last a lifetime.

I believe that my passion and dedication to Him is His secret weapon.
I believe that I am His destiny.

I believe in Us.

I believe in Our breath-taking possibilities and endless potential.
I believe Our love, respect, faith, and integrity make us fucking amazing.

I believe Our skills complement one another perfectly.
I believe Our personalities blend effortlessly.

I believe in Our harmony.
I believe in Our future.

As we walk this journey with hands held and fingers intertwined.
There is no one I'd rather follow into tomorrow than my M.
~DominaKat

Reflections #2: May 23, 2014


I'm purposefully taking time to reflect more intently on the positive little pieces of each day.

I have to live today focused on what I can give Him, how I can serve Him, and how I can help Us build Our tomorrow. 

What I gave Him today:

  • His submissive...I fought as long as I could on my own and then knelt at his feet when I began to loose ground and struggle.  Going to Him allowed me to submit openly my emotions and instead of letting the warrior in me rise up independently and fight alone against life's frustrations, I relied on His strength. He held my hand, and I followed His lead.
  • Alfred...we reviewed a 2nd round chapter edits together positively and productively.  I went through a 3rd round of edits grinning like a fool because it was just that good!  As he said last night, "We have a perfect marriage. I'm an author, and you're an editor." We share a common vision, and my goal is to do do everything I can to help lift Him high for the world to see. We work extremely well together, and together we accomplish amazing things. Each step we complete helps build Our tomorrow.
  • Alfred...another fun, classy graphic to promote His work.
  • His woman...kicked ass and did nearly three miles! I want to be as healthy and fit as I can for Him.  I want to be ready for my transition to NYC, and I want every man to look at Him and think, "Lucky fucking bastard." lol
  • His little girl/pet...let the softer sides of me open up and breathe again. It's been a while since I've felt that comfortable with those pieces.
  • His property...continued to give up control and allowed Him to make decision about my habits.
I have to focus on what He gives me today and the steps forward He takes that lead Us toward Our tomorrow. 

What He gave me today:
  • My Man listened openly to my stressors and encouraged me to hold on, that we are going to get there. ~sigh~ Sometimes just hearing His belief and desire for us can lift me up so high I can fly.
  • My Owner/Daddy sent me a completely unexpected "I love you pet." That affection...feeling that cherished made me whimper and my submission surrender to Him.
  • My M stayed relaxed and open while discussing another round of edits for a chapter.  He's helping us create an extremely positive energy for our working relationship.  He put together some fantastic revisions that highlight his superior story telling and reinforce the character development objectives He's determined to nurture.  All of these steps will lead Us into tomorrow. I'm so proud of His work and inherent talent!
  • My Daddy was just...sweet to me.  I know...it's little.  I know...maybe others get bigger and grandiose. But those little things mean the world to me.  With His tenderness and sweetness, I feel treasured, cherished, and important to Him.
  • My Owner laid down the law and gave me clear unmistakable orders on how I was to behave Sunday.  His protection, nurturing, and care demonstrated how much He cherishes His pet. 
  • My Owner/Man tucked me in last night.  Long hours of conversations filled laughter and banter and debates.  We really do have so much fun together.  ~sigh~ I was so emotionally open and vulnerable as I gave Him the last that I had for the day.
Yesterday was quiet and low-key. We simply enjoyed and appreciated one another.  :-)
~DominaKat

Saturday, May 24, 2014

End of the Day Reflection #1

To truly set something into my head, it's best if somehow writing is involved.  My words, the process of finding them, a the method of communicating them through writing lets me reinforce my energy and sort through the haze to find the most basic truths.  So...I'm going to try to take the time to reflect more intently on the little pieces of each day.

I have to live today focused on what I can give Him, how I can serve Him, and how I can help Us build Our tomorrow. 

What I gave Him today:

  • His submissive...worked hard to focus her attention on a positive mindset, and I apologized almost immediately when my struggle got the best of me.  This helped us both be Our best today so that we are able to do whatever we can to build Our tomorrow.
  • Alfred...gave another chapter of edits and suggested revisions/ideas; a top-notch graphic to promote His latest interview.  Both are pieces that will help build Our tomorrow.
  • Alfred...shared with Him positive feedback from her small network. Good, strong, positive energy for us both.
  • His woman...is pleasantly sore from working out to be as healthy and fit as I can for Him.  This will help me be better, stronger, faster in the long run so that I can do.
  • His pet...scrabbled in her suitcase to find something pretty to wear for Him.  Hopefully that gave Him pleasure and made His day a little bit brighter.
  • His property...continued to give up control and allowed Him to make decision about my habits.
I have to focus on what He gives me today and the steps forward He takes that lead Us toward Our tomorrow. 

What He gave me today:

  • My Daddy sent me an adorable picture of himself that made me giggle and damn near bounce on my toes.  Okay...I think I actually did a little.  lol  ~sigh~ I love when He brings me joy. It helps me relax and bask in His sunshine.
  • My Owner had His pet dress pretty for Him.  I felt desired and appreciated.
  • My M shared with me another fascinating story idea, a great blog post to read, another round of edits for a chapter.  All steps to take Us into tomorrow, but those also give me pride in Him and feel honored that He values my opinion.
  • My Man called a couple of times simply to share His excitement about something with His woman.  I am honored that He reaches for me first.  I feel treasured and cherished and important to Him.
  • My Daddy teased and played with me.
Today we were moving in the right direction a little faster than usual. :-)
~DominaKat

Thursday, May 22, 2014

Tomorrow

Some days are challenging in a relationship, and while I have my protocols and my own creed that I follow sometimes it is the approach I take that doesn't always work well.  I've learned many lesson by realizing what not to do and what I won't do again.  Maybe coming from somewhat of a negative perspective doesn't allow me to be as positive as I could be.

I have to live today focused on what I can give Him, how I can serve Him, and how I can help Us build Our tomorrow.

I have to focus on what He gives me today and the steps forward He takes that lead Us toward Our tomorrow.

No...I can not dwell on what He didn't give me then or the pain and fear I felt in those rocky dark days.
No...I should not stress about the mistakes I made.

Today I must concentrate on being the best partner, woman, submissive, pet, property I can be.

Everyday I must to continue to trust in Him, that He won't let me down, that He means what He says, and that He will do all He's promised to do with me.

I have to trust myself completely that I will never again let myself down for the sake of my partner.

Yesterday is not today.  Today is not Our future.  Our future together will be determined by each of the steps We take and by Our love, intention, honesty, trust, and loyalty to one another.  Those characteristics are the foundation of what We have today and what We build on now.

I will not let the few rocky times in Our past spoil would We could have tomorrow.
~DominaKat

Thursday, May 15, 2014

Confession

There are days when the need to be a nasty, filthy slut is damn near all consuming.  I'm not talking mild slut.  I'm talking squirting down my thighs in public slut.  Cum-covered lips on the subway kind of slut.  Raising my dress and humping a fire-hyrdrant with my fat whorish tits hang out slut.  The kind of slut that leaves M grinning darkly tugging on my leash as old ladies cross their chest and men adjust their thickening cocks.

Yes...that's me this morning.  With the overwhelming need to spread my legs and be used in the most filthy vile ways.  Pain.  Pleasure.  ~sigh~ It makes no fucking difference.  My single point of existence in these moments is to be M's Black owned three-holed piece of thick white meat, to cum in groaning bliss, to harden a dick and make it throb with a need to conquer. 

I'm no saint.  lol  No.  Not at all.  Look elsewhere for that kind of sweet purity.  I'm sure that would be a delight to corrupt, but that's not me.  I'm well down the trail to hell.

No.

I. 
Am. 
A fucking wretched, sinning, crawling gutterslut who seeks complete subjugation and humiliation.

I need broken down and shattered with His mind.
I need to dance in frenzied madness by His hands.

I am a fuck-craving whore that needs beat and used until I'm a crumpled stained mess on the floor reeking of lust and destruction.  Even then I'd still spread my legs for more, just like a dog seeking a belly rub.  I beg for my holes to be affectionately and violently violated.  I pant for M.  I whimper.  I'll even bark if that will please Him.

But the day begins, and so I politely close my legs, wipe my mind clean of my pathetic salacious thoughts, and straighten my clothes to be respectable.  Smile pretty.  Be good.  Pretend I didn't start my day with my hand between my legs playing in His wet sloppy hole and thrashing on the bed.  

Ohhhh...look isn't that cute.  Puppy and kitten posts.  Uplifting quotes of the day.  Lovely. 

I return to the realities, tragedies, and games of my vanilla existence.

Smile...just smile...and fight the urge to squat on the ground to cum like a dog.
~DominaKat

Saturday, May 10, 2014

The Brightest Star in My Sky

I've thought about writing this post every day for about the last two weeks.  Each time I thought...naaaa...anyone who's read my blog already knows this stuff.  It isn't something new or exciting.  But sitting here tonight reflecting, i can't help but put my thoughts to words and throw my emotions out into the ether.  My words will once again leave me completely vulnerable.  My heart exposed.  My deepest emotions unguarded.

But for M...it's worth it.  There's nothing I wouldn't do for my Owner.  There's nothing I wouldn't give to my Daddy.  There's nothing I wouldn't share freely with my Man.

I love Him.  I'm in love with Him.  There's never been any question about those two things.  But even with that deep, strong foundation I stand on each day, there are days when He literally blows me away and the love and pride I feel for Him leaves me stunned and speechless.

Twelve days ago, M reached for the sky yet again.  He took a big risk.  He laid it Himself on the line.  It was logical, but still that didn't negate the risk.  In that moment He was larger than life to me.  I was in awe.  And when he said to me, "Maybe this will be what gets you here to me." I nearly fell to my knees I was so humbled. I couldn't believe His eyes were also focused on me in this moment. It's still sometimes hard for me to believe He wants me as much as He does.  There's just not that many people in the world who truly reach for their dreams. There's few who truly do everything they can to build a future with the one they love.

I'd begun to believe those Men only lived in fairy tales.  I'd long ago lost hope of every being the one a Man fought to have and to keep.  But in M, I've found my hero.

Every day he has worked incredibly hard, harder than I ever imagined, to accomplish.  To do.  To achieve.  Again and again.  Relentlessly.  Every night I marveled at the magic He created and at all that He had done.  He exceeded every one of my expectations.  I'm so fucking proud of Him.  His intent, focus, and drive has been phenomenal.  He's gone deep.  He's been unwavering.  Where others would have slacked and become distracted or sought the surface satisfaction of fun and fresh and easy, M has fully embraced what we're building together and fought with everything He's had to bring our dreams to a reality.

It's not always easy.  Sometimes it's difficult even between us when we're working so hard on everything.  But neither of us for a moment considers giving up.  It's all so damn close.  And in each other we see the keys to everything we've ever hoped for.  We push each other to the limits.  We support each other when we stumble.  But most of all we never fucking give up.  We believe in each other.

~whimper~  Yes...there are tears streaming down my face.  I can't help them.  I'm not perfect.  I also know He's not perfect. (Yes...I really do live in reality. lol) But My Daddy, my Owner, my M...means the world to me.  The softest truest pieces of me lie helplessly at His feet.

I want so very very much to spend the rest of my life by His side doing everything I can to help Him reach into the stars for His place.  To curl up below Him, my leash tight in His hand, as He shines bright and true would be my greatest honor and privilege.   He. Is. My. King.  Yesterday, today, and tomorrow.  No matter what.  No matter where this all goes.  In my eyes He's always been the brightest star in the sky, and I will follow His light to my last breath.
~DominaKat